So there’s been a lot of talk about what “dirty little secrets” Sarah Palin is trying to hide. And lots of talk about her politics. And lots of talk about her family. And lots of talk about her religious views. But I think people are missing the really serious issue about her religion that she’s not telling us. Let me ‘splain.

Look at the names of her children: Piper, Willow, Bristol, Track and Trig. Apart from being a bit odd and hippie-ish, there’s a disturbing fact staring us in the face. It has to do with two of the girls.

First, there’s Piper. What can we learn from her name? We learn that Sarah Palin and her husband are fans of the television show Charmed. Next, there’s Willow. What can we learn from her name? That Sarah Palin and her husband are fans of the show Buffy the Vampire Slayer. And what do the characters Piper and Willow on these two shows have in common? I’ll tell you:

WITCHCRAFT!!!!!!

Yes, folks, it’s pretty clear what’s going on. Sarah Palin and her husband are fans of television shows about witches, and therefore they are clearly witches themselves. So forget about what she may or may not have done in office, or what she says are her religious beliefs. She’s a witch. And how do you knooow if she’s a witch or not? There are many ways to tell, but the most accurate involves a duck and large scales.

Note: for the humor-impaired among you, this was a joke. Or my lame attempt at a joke, anyway.